two left feet and two right shoes (repost from myspace)

january 19, 2006:

i wonder about circumstance. and coincidence. i think a lot about people whose lives touched mine on a tangent. and for the second of overlap, it was electric. so i wonder, were the circumstances different, would we have been best friends? could we have been soul mates? could we have had a lovely tragically doomed romance? because i think we could have.

then i wonder what circumstances im squandering, and in which im reveling. the people whom i love, is it just because i was in the right place at the right time? is that all it is? well, no, i'm not seriously concerned that coincidence is all it is. but how large of a factor is it? what if i had stayed at that party talking to you before you left for europe a half hour longer, instead of leaving with jonathan? would you be the one whose thoughts i could all but read for three tragic months? what if i had asked you to help me hash out a drawing one night, instead of asking tom? would you be the one calling me to help you hash out your relationship problems, three years later?

do i really want to know?





yes. yes i do. i dont know what i think i'd do with the knowledge. but, did that ever stop desire?